Line Calls

French Open, Part 1


This is first column by Peter Aaron, our Line Calls columnist. Peter calls 'em like he sees 'em. If you don't like the call--or if you do--send in your email responses (comment@tennisone.com) and we'll post them. Peter's opinions are his and don't represent those of TennisONE.

Past Line Calls Columns

Mac, Love Him and Hate Him

I wonder why John McEnroe is not getting hoarse with his Cal Ripken-like marathon commentary on USA Network's French Open. I guess USA Network had to pay McEnroe some major bucks, and they intend to squeeze every last penny out of him. It's easy to see why USA wants him on all the time. McEnroe is easily the most interesting, insightful and entertaining tennis commentator around. Beyond keeping us entertained for hours, I've noticed that McEnroe constantly serves up one central strategic lesson for hackers and pros alike: DON'T GO FOR SO MUCH, DUMMY! Five minutes don't go by with McEnroe saying something like, "You need to aim that ball 2-3 feet away from that line," or "I would take something off that first serve and get in a higher percentage," or, "he went for way too much on that passing shot--make him hit a volley." It's ironic, isn't it? Renowned for his flashy shot-making ability around the net, McEnroe is now the guru of high percentage tennis.

Now that we're on to irony, my favorite subject, let's discuss the other side of John. His growing stature and maturity on camera only makes you wonder all the more why McEnroe continues to be the biggest jerk on the court. Is someone slipping something into John's Gatorade before he walks on court to turn him into Mr. Hyde? His latest on-court infamy took place at the April 27th semifinal match against Andres Gomez at the Coopers and Lybrand Men's 35 Championship. Mac outdid himself--even for Mac. He ripped umpire and spectator alike with "f.... you" this and "bastard" that. My theory of Mac's Jekyll and Hyde personality, at least at this point in his life, is that he hasn't truly given up the idea that he is a great tennis player. Remember, he never really retired and took his bows, as Edberg is now graciously doing. The frustration and rage erupt because somewhere inside he knows that his tennis greatness is over and he's now forced to play with the old men. At one point during the Gomez match, McEnroe screamed at the chair umpire, "You think this is the f....ing ATP Tour?" The taunt was for himself as much as the umpire.

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Responses

Cover It Up

Andre Agassi's dispirited performance en route to his 2nd round loss to unknown Chris 'Country' Woodruff has everyone saying out loud what they've been thinking privately since the Australian Open: Agassi is a head case. I agree--at least at this point in the year. The quick and easy explanation trotted out is that his engagement to Brooke is sapping Andre's competitive drive. I can buy that, to some degree. Being number one in any sport requires, at the very least, your complete attention. How can a movie star companion planning his first wedding help on that score? But I think other factors are at work to undermine Andre's game. First, the loss in the U.S. Open finals last year, after the previous 12 months procession to the throne, was a major psychological train wreck for Andre. He had won the 1995 Australian Open; he had won all the hard court tournaments coming into the US Open, he was ranked number one, and then wham-o, Sampras, that sly fox resting easy during the blistering hard court season, rises from the weeds and knocks him off. Again and again we see that climbing to the number one position is much easier than occupying it. Being number one for most of the year clearly drained Andre, and when he couldn't keep a grip on it--thanks to Pete--he fell into a competitive funk from which even the Rasputin of Winning Ugly tennis, Brad Gilbert, hasn't been able to retrieve him.

And while we're on the subject of Andre's head, why oh why has he abandoned his Nike kerchief? Short hair on Andre was bad enough, but now we have to see his pear-shaped noggin all the time. Andre, take some advice: cover it up, babe.

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Don't Cover it Up

Why don't people get off Mary Pierce's back over the black, sleeveless and (partially) backless dress she wore at the French Open? Let me be straight. I don't really care for Pierce as a player or a competitor. She's a whiner, and thus far, has not demonstrated the heart required to be a top five player, much less a true champion. On the other hand, she looks fine in that dress (to be scrupulously honest, not great--a little too beefy in the shoulders and arms). Yes, it brings sex into tennis. Go ahead and call me a drooling male chauvinist, but I say, that's great! The popularity of tennis has plummeted in the last twenty years. As we all know, sex sells. Tennis has a long way to go before the barbarians are at the gate, so I say until we see them approach a little closer, let's loosen up and encourage Mary to wear more of the same.

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Take Them Off

There's no one in men's tennis I admire more than Pete Sampras. He continues to demonstrate the class of a true champion. But why does he continue to wear those baggy cotton pants? By the third set, his butt and crotch are completely soaked through with his sweat stains. Pete, it ain't pretty, kid. Get together with Andre and make a pact: Andre to wear the kerchief and you to swap-out the pants--and think nylon.